been asked to sing for a wedding!!!

I'm so excited.... and no, I just can't hide it!

It's gonna be wonderful!

its for my friends aunt, and I get to sing two songs....a week friday.... =D

voting card came thru... and I am going to vote for the referendum....

WHOOHIOOOOOO!!


I have a voting card... and I'm NOT AFRAID to use it! 


slightly hacked off about the alternative voting system... but it gives the party that no one really likes a chance, and a part that everyone wants OUT a chance to stay in and cling on....

like a bungly clown.... smack it... "I'm not goin anywhere!"


grrrrrr..... and.... I have an opinion as to why i will vote the way I have decided.. I KNOW... its opinion based on debate.... =S 

guess who's back back back... back again.....?

BACK!!! from a wonderful trip in Italy!!!


everything was wonderful... sometimes things were funny... I can surely say that I had a wonderful time...
I am very lucky.... already i miss my boyfriend... =( 

                                                  Epic fail.... =D 

                                                                  The Vatican

                                                        Inside Basilica

                                                        Michaelangelo's sculpture in queen christina chapel... 

                                                       It really was an amazingly epic organ

                                          Rome

                                                     Florence

                       The name of these tablets are a little disturbing....

                               I didnt see Lenny henry! 

                                   and now for some car related photo's!!!! 

                                                   EPIC FAIL! ironic considering that a fire extinguisher is now a trip hazard..

weekend!!!

Bought my new case to travel with in the holidays!!!
some hell of a case... it's like a tardis, and could probably fit my inside twice.....


it also turns 360, not that this is hugely essential.... it expands by 25% c'est tres important pour moi! ;)


saw some interesting sights over the course of my weekend too....

such as, the world's worst hot chocolate, cannabis insense wtf?! omg I know!!!   and a modified pub sign, which was kinda childish, but what the hell... I found it kinda funny....

free poo... hahaha 

good school report...

RELIEF! 


a good school report.... 


Mum and Dad pretty pleased, and I am now spending my weekend in quiet study, whilst musing and crafting the last little pieces of my composition... (aaaahhh the gentle soft sigh of the cello, how I love thee!)


Contemplating watching "Metropolis" tonight.... (yes the 1927 version, what do you think I am???!!!)
Apparently it can be used as a text for:


1. the creative project about women in film (the female robot!)


2. the Marxist aspects of the written exam


3. even drama concerning Woyzeck in my written concept...
also contemplating forcing my younger brotehr towatch Cleopatra today, as we have the time, and he asked the unforgiveable question at a time of great sadness... in case you didnt know, the question he asked was: "Who's Elizabeth Taylor?!" =O I know right...


;)

C <3

It's Friday, Friday, Friday...ooooh

Friday!!!

singing, went well... more singing at lunchtime break... singing jaaaazz.... =)

randomosity in the library when we were trying where's wally glasses. I love my friends, they're so insane and happy =)

Obviously, they don't look good on everyone.....  =P

and I am shocked that someone as easy on the eye as I am can become so physically horrible simply by putting some glasses on! (ahem...)

omg.... school reports are in today.... (GULP!)

sooooo scared!


not overly sure what i am going to do if the outcome isn't great.... if its good, I will post it on here... if its bad, expect me to be crying on skype, or if you dont have my skype, expect me posting depressing quotes on my facebook status... =S

you've been warned...

=)

News I can't share! haha

Do you not find it so annoying when you have really exciting good news, but can't share it because of prying eyes and ears that mean malice?

SO ANNOYING!!!

anyway, gotta get it outta my system, so I will write the short version.... I am excited, and happy, the sun is shining and no, I am not stoned...

that's the short version. But more to the point, I am happy. not sad and insecure and angry and isolated and depressed for once, everything is rosy and happy and smily. Kinda like a kid's drawing with random colours and a rainbow and a big yellow sun or something odd like that.

=)

When bored linguists sing...

Bored in my kitchen, so learnt another aria...Dvorjak's song to the moon =)

I would have posted this video as a separate entry, but alas... the video is too many KB..... =D 

C <3

nothing much to report

Boooooooooooooring..... what to do when there is nothing much to report? School, same as ever, written coursework finally done. 11 drafts later (HOW...?!!!) 
On the topic of exploitattion of women in films. One issue with the creative piece... 


I NEED YOUR HELP! 


I will post things on here too, and explain where to find my creative piece once it's done. I will post a link, could you please comment and let me know your opinions on the exploitation of women in films?!

C <3

News update...

Too many events!!! So crazy, I have joined both Cantorion and Irfon Singers and Now I can be SWITZERLAND!!!! WHOOOHOOO!!!!


POULENC GLORIA and FAURE'S REQUIEM BABY!!!! oh yeah!!!  


School hoodies designs have also appeared into existence AT LAST!!!! =D 
Mine will be pink of course... not sure what to have on the back of it though. If I put my name I will be boring.... If I put some odd thing I will look at it in years to come and think... omg... what a fool I was in high school!  Might be really trashy, and have "Blondiee" or something like that
or I might take the piss out of myself, and modern  society and stereotyping by putting the name of a well known doll... guess who(?) =P 


=D Really happy for my boyfriend, who has just got into Cardiff AND Swansea uni.... =D 
But I am also happy for myself obviously, 'cause that means we can be finally be together, and share a flat or something... YAY!!!!! =D 


=) 


Also learning Mozart's "Alleluia" is coming along well, but still being a pain in the rumpa.... kinda like a kitten, cute, finally getting to grips with stopping it pooping in the house... but still REALLY ANNOYING when it doesn't do what its told, cause you're not experienced at training cats.... =D




Singing "Mack the Knife" with the strings group Friday as well.. which was awesome beyong the realms of coolness =D its gonna be really exciting! I have slightly missed musical theatre in its own little camp way, with its sequins and cheesyness. It's like Louie Spence. Every household needs a Louis to brighten up the day...


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2dstOfHwaB8








The best of Louis Spence




and on that note, I feel I have already said too much!


Untill next time....  (Mwah darliiiing) 

C <3 

It's amazing the weird things your family try to do to make you feel better...

Ever noticed that the only time when things get really random with family and friends is when really bad things have happened, and they want to help you not to feel bad all the time....


Fun times were had by buying crates of alkohol in bulk.... The only way to do it... and drinking it and consequently acting like fools.... 


One of the boys got a makeover at 4:30am 'cause we'd been up all night, and very bored and crazy... Later this picture ended up published on Facebook 'cause teens are cruel! 
check it out!!!  http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=203573426324801&set=a.201102856571858.62557.100000164356788

SOOO BAAADD!!!!! ahahaha!!! =D 
but funny... until.... a hissy fit followed for about 3hours.... then I felt really bad.... =( not funny...(until the morning!)


sadly people had to go home yesterday, and it has been just me, mum and my two brothers in the house. And my big bro leaves today... also very very sad..... I will have nothing to do but sulk, study and watch movies (all at the same time too....)

C <3

I regret to make a public announcement

Recently things have been extremely difficult for me, and a sequence of events that kicked off last night has just made things almost impossible. 

It has been a really bumpy road, and I have learned things along the way, but never really felt PART of anything, and last nights events really verified what I knew already. It really hit home that I never did, and never would belong in that choir. It was all just bad timing though. 

Firstly I will not apologise for that which was not my fault. I was well within my rights having asked who said what  on that day that I was not there to defend myself. Speaking ill of someone behind their back is unnecessary cowardice, causing friction which is not needed in a team. It is also very immature. I simply do not feel in any position to cause myself unnecessary hurt and anxiety when people behave like this! It has also made things very difficult at home, and I don't see why such things should be affected by something that I loved, and saw as a future career. There are other places I could choose to sing, and to go through all of this in one night hardly seems worth it when I could just go elsewhere. 

To add fuel to a fire that did not need to be started, I found that my father was ill when I returned from choir practice and the drama that had kicked off there. In the time scale of just half an hour he took a turn for the worst and went into a brief cardiac arrest. He had been ill for a few days, but put off seeing a doctor for a week or so as we had family visiting. It was also his birthday. He didn't need this, and frankly, Neither did I!

I was then woken up by my mother this morning to notify me that I have been kicked out of the youth choir, just like that, instantly, for confronting people who slandered me behind my back last night. (Another bombshell...) Straight before two T.V appearances that would be desirable to anyone's conservatoire application. I was already being denied an opportunity for not being well liked enough to avoid slander and scorn of others. I did not see how this was fair, and quite plainly, as I write this, I still don't!

 "At least I give up music without wasting 10 years of my life studying for a career I will never be allowed the opportunity to fulfill....!" were the exact words I recall speaking down the phone that morning to an already vexed choir mistress. I am not denying that the way I spoke to her was over dramatic, rude, rather loud for the early morning, and perhaps this phone call should never have taken place. After all, the damage had already been done. This is not a whodunit film plot, and I was adding fuel to the inferno started last night. Regardless of what I had done or hadn't done, a decision had been made and finalized. No amount of talking to her was ever going to make things better. What happened is now in the past. Regardless of who did what to whom, I was already going to pay the penalty 50 times over, for a sequence of events that were not my fault and had escalated out of control.

I was originally aiming to use this blog to contact people, and to promote my singing. But give the circumstances and the shape things have taken, I don't see this as a viable option anymore.

I want to thank everyone who has supported me with my singing, and given me the confidence I needed  which has helped to shape me into the person that I am today. I am grateful to everyone who has given me a chance, invited me to concerts, parties, services etc. Also to the people at Llangollen international Eisteddfod for letting me sing on that amazing stage in front of those cameras (I know I started off really nervous, but I enjoyed it, I really did, Diolch yn fawr iawn!) it is also an honour to even be selected to sing there. I know this is starting to look like a speech from the Oscars, but I also need to say thank you to the music Dept at my school for being patient in teaching me, showing me theory skills (which I will someday learn to master), and to my singing teacher, who has been so kind and patient, and despite my negative outlook at first and my protesting "Miss, I can't do that" has trained and trained my instrument to make it sound the way it does, and gave me a sense of self belief, good breathing, good phrasing, correct resonance, a good range, more flexibility, operatic runs, arias I didn't even know existed and never dreamed of singing, correct German pronunciation in songs I have learnt, correct Italian pronunciation in songs I have learnt, correct French in songs I have learnt, Performance skills, use of the cheekbones (smiling, oh yes), Correct open sounding vowel sounds, as well as many many other skills I will never forget, and hope to at least pass on to others even IF I can't utilise them in the future. 

But, I would also like to say to all those people I have thanked, (and to everyone else too)

To all of you who have supported me, helped me, given me a chance, given me guidance, (Mum, Dad, you as well...) quite possibly the most important message of all 

I'm really sorry I let you down... 

I don't know what I need to look into as a career anymore, from the moment I chose my G.C.S.E options,I forced myself into a corner and took subjects that related to this career choice,  which I never imagined I would need to rethink.I felt I knew where I was going, I had the wind in my hair and the world at my feet and I simply felt that I had the talent, the help, the skills and the potential to achieve these wild ambitions....

Maybe I can still see it as a hobby, Singing and music can be recreational rather than vocational. I don't want to turn my back on everything that has been given to me, let anyone else down or turn down any opportunities to perform when I am invited to, and I loved Llangollen, maybe I will come back someday!

I just feel that the road I have been travelling has for some time now has been getting increasingly more and more narrow with every step I have taken in this direction. I'd like to walk in the grassy verges for a while rather than reach a dead end. 

I cannot emphasize enough that I make this decision with a very heavy heart. Lord knows that writing this is hard for me too. But I really hope that you will all understand why I have decided these things, and whilst it may be a lot to take in, or a lot to ask of someone to understand such a colossal change of heart in something I feel so strongly about, I sympathize, and hope that you will come to understand in the future. I am not turning my back on singing or on music. I just need a break to rethink things, to calm down, and recuperate. Quite plainly I have been tired! I have no supernatural powers that allow me to be untouchable, to feel no emotion, and to never need to sleep. This whole experience has been very draining for me as well as my family. I would like to say that I have learned a lot from being in the choir, that I have learnt from being part of a team, and learnt great leadership skills and improved my confidence. But whilst I may be many things, I am not a liar. I have merely learnt to understand at least one place I am not wanted, and have learnt that no matter how you try, if you are not wanted in a place, your efforts get you nowhere, you will simply be sabotaged, punished, and generally made to feel unwelcome. These are things that should never be associated with choral singing or with music. I also must labor the point across that I feel the way that I have been treated is incredibly unfair, and can only hope that the person who replaces me is not made to feel as I do right now. 

I feel that I am for once in my life, making the right choice....

Sincerely,

C <3

CAKEY!

Preparing the space for baking the cake...
with lots of Baileys..... and chocolate...... 

stuff...

Whilst on my way home with stuff, and birthday card!

One gets a few odd looks from villagers who pass by and wonder why you are holding your phone strangely without looking at the screen and talking to yourself..... ;)

CAKEY!!!!!

Daddy's birthday!

Woke up kinda late and had to try to catch up my mum, and dad and brother and little nephews to go shopping at 9:00 am.... honestly who does this? especially when there will be 6 people in a 5 person car...pffft.... 


I went to the local post office and bought a birthday card there.... only problem is, I got a little carried away when signing the card, and hope that the randomisity of my humour is well received rather than seen as ruining a perfectly good card... 

Saw A BUS!!! which is funny because in this secret location I wont state on cyberspace buses don't tend to run when you want them.... I also needed to purchase a specific ingredient to bake this cake for Dad's birthday. 

When bored linguists are left alone with no one to talk to....

When bored linguists are in at home, with no people to talk to whilst chilling.... They revise... and when they are done revising? Well... You be the judge....

RANDOM!!!! <3   Crazy right...? I was talking about not knowing what to do with the rest of my evening, whilst not knowing what to do with the rest of my evening.... No internet..... 

( OMG I missed u!) XoXo

C <3

Without internet for several days....

I had a meltdown over the fact that we had no internet... No Skype, No Facebook, No YouTube, No point.... I was so incredibly BORED! Not to mention that the winter throat infection is back with vengeance.... and no amount of gargling TCP (which tastes like death in a bottle) resting the voice and eating forest honey can ward off... Must see the doctor today, or if not,ASAP. I WILL NOT BE ILL FOR THE CARDIFF CONCERT!


Dad's Birthday is in a few days too, so everything is crazy! We also have family visiting and I have 2 T.V appearances coming up what with choir competitions and other singing shenanigans....


A Christmas gift arrived yesterday! From Family we haven't seen in AGESSSSSSSSS....
Shocked much. Spa kit=AWESOME!

I can't be bothered to type EVERYTHING.... I do actually have a life.... hahaha =P (No really.... I do, =D)

C <3

...Postmodern art